The most crucial and important unit of modern society is family. Within such a little community, most people begin their lives and learn basic moral and ethical concepts. This significant part of society prepares everyone for future work, marriage, and establishment of their own family. When a family separates, the event has a detrimental impact not only on spouses but also on children experiencing their first and most difficult challenge. A close-knit wedlock is a key to successful living of every member of the little community. However, when conflicts and tension result in a divorce, a good background for the happy and prosperous life of children and adults is in danger.
Children suffer much stronger in comparison to their parents, as they have to make a difficult and almost impossible choice of what side to choose. Such choices may determine the entire further life of a person, and there may be no way back. Moreover, a divorce can have other unpleasant consequences and effects on little ones’ and adults’ lives.
When a child grows up in a troubled family where a mother and a father constantly argue with each other or even fight, the general social traits of such individuals are affected adversely. These teenagers are more vulnerable to developing different addictions, experiencing failures, and having no desire to succeed at all. However, the results of recent research show that if a child was brought up in a family where the conflict between parents or relatives was an ordinary thing, such a teenager could feel relief after the divorce (Arkowitz & Lilienfeld, 2013). This happens mostly because of exhaustion by the chronic family stress and the only way out of the situation being the divorce. Children understand it and recover more quickly. On the contrary, an unexpected divorce of parents and a breakup of a seemingly good, well-to-do family may be a serious stress for a child, and this act produces a great impact on all members of the wedlock.
Divorce is a great factor in weakening of relationships between children and adults as well. It is the reason of kids’ disobedience and neglect towards parental requests. From the moment when all papers are signed, and a family does not exist any longer, a teenager has no authority to control him or her. An adolescent is left alone with fears, anger, and grief. It can be the reason for many self-harming or anti-social behaviors and acts that potentially ruin the child’s life. For example, some possible outcomes that adults can face after they have divorced are the early loss of virginity of their kids, aggressiveness, adolescent pregnancy, and drug or alcohol addiction. Besides, many teenagers affected by the divorce of their parents do not want to have their children and are afraid of getting into serious relationships and homemaking (Cherlin, 2009).
It is hard to single out the proper age to cope with the problem better. For instance, teenagers understand the situation fully and are willing to reconcile with such a reality, but they behave more aggressively and tend to make more mistakes than little ones. Small children are confused and puzzled by this mishap, since they believe their mother and father can get married again. Thus, it is hard for adults and children to forget the situation and let it go (Pickhardt, 2011). Hence, a major piece of advice for families planning a divorce is to make a thorough psychological preparation for their children to ensure that the process goes smoothly and does not result in any dramatic consequences in the emotional, psychological, and social domain for their children.
To put it briefly, the creation of a new family is a very serious issue. Maintaining good relationships within a single wedlock is crucial not only for both spouses but also for their kids and close relatives. It is especially difficult for children and teenagers to overcome numerous consequences of the challenge of parental divorce, and to live a productive life afterwards. That is why parents should think about their children first when deciding to unmarry, and arrange everything with proper regard to the broader family’s well-being, not being guided by their emotions and anger instead.
Arkowitz, H., & Lilienfeld, S. O. (2013). Is divorce bad for children? Scientific American. Retrieved from https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/is-divorce-bad-for-children/
Cherlin, A. (2009). Marriage, divorce, remarriage. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press.
Pickhardt, C. E. (2011). The impact of divorce on young children and adolescents. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/201112/the-impact-divorce-young-children-and-adolescents